Cannot sleep again. Always so worried about Cam, and sad. Being a parent is my only real job and it is the hardest job in the world. It's so hard to raise children for 21 years, and now face the feeling you failed one of them somehow. Somehow their life is not a happy one, not a fulfilled one, not a thankful one, and it tears your heart in half because you only want happiness and self love for them. I wish I could make it happen but just can't. I hurt. I hurt so badly. Please comfort me, oh Lord.