I missed all my classes today and German too. Felt like shit for most of the day due to nicotine overdose. Man, this was so bad I wanted to open my stomach with a knife at the bus stop. I started watching "Orange is the New Black". That shit good! Oh, Alice answered me today with some fucked up shit. She's tight with time and Internet but the latter stuff was fucked up. She said "fuck it" to healthy life and started drinking and smoking. Whaaaat. Bitch, that ain't no deal! I was all nervous about me being an alcoholic and now you do the same shit? I don't know how to feel about that. I think I'm going to throw up. Fuck my nervous system, right? Right now I want either of these options: be right there with her or tear out my eyes and heart and smash them to pieces.